I was just making dinner for myself a few minutes ago, and I couldn’t help but think “wow, I’d would really enjoy this more if I had a girlfriend who could keep me company.” And then I started to imagine what she might be like. I came to the realization that I was imaging someone pretty similar to one of my friends who I used to be somewhat close to. So, in addition to the weight that I am feeling so lonely and down, I realize that what I really want is so much closer than I had realized, while still being out of reach.