I’m going through depression and all I can say is, you have no idea how it feels like until you have one. One-day sadness does not equal what it feels like to be depressed.
If you don’t have depression, you have no idea what it feels like to have no purpose of living, waking up every day just to exist. Sleeping all day just because you don’t have anything to do, nothing that would bring you joy, nothing that would make life worth living.
You have no idea what it feels like to starve, just because you don’t see why you need that anymore. You have no idea what it feels like to hold a knife next to your veins and find no reasons to live. You don’t know, how it feels to pass out every night just because you cried too much, you don’t know how it feels like to hide it from your family, to act like you’re fine. It’s almost impossible to smile to others, when you’re screaming inside. It’s like war with yourself, you wake up wondering, if you will be dead by the next day.
You don’t even have control of your actions. You just sit there, after taking five-hour nap and wonder, why should you even bother to eat, to shower, to drink, to do anything. You just sit there and think, who would miss me, if I cut my veins this very second? You just think, how happy people are who think they are depressed, but run happily after a few hours.
They have no idea, what it feels like to fight with yourself to survive. They don’t know how hard it is to get out of bed and drink a glass of water, so you don’t dehydrate. They don’t know how hard it is to reply to a text “how are you?” They don’t even have a clue how it feels like and they don’t appreciate it. I’m so sorry for people going through depression, because it’s way harder than you would think. Hiding it from your family, acting just fine and passing out from crying is not something you want to feel. It’s not something you should feel. People are supposed to be fine, be happy to be alive. People shouldn’t fight with themselves over their life. It’s not fine. It’s definitely not okay.