It started two years ago. I am a gamer and one day a server owner broke some rules and ghosted into my base. We had a fun rivalry since that day. We played games together on and off from that point.

Bought each other games just to play with the other. That led to texts, then voice chats, then video chats. Before we knew it, we were each other’s best friend. Eventually we were talking every single day. We watched movies together and ate meals together. We even helped each other with life and relationship advice.

After a while we were in a happy long-distance relationship. I have loved people before, but this was the first time I fell in love. He made me change my mind on so many things. For the first time in so long I actually felt I wasn’t alone.

We knew every single thing about each other the good the bad the horrible. Then after so long I burst the bubble. I think I finally realized this amazing imperfect beautiful person will NEVER hold me. Will NEVER be here.

I couldn’t leave to be with him and he could never leave to be with me. We had things we had to stay for. I decided to let him go and that he deserves a real relationship. Being in love we wanted to do what was best for the other.

From that point on we were alone but together. We still tell each other everything. We talk about our relationships and lives. I am in love with a man I can never be with. He is in love with me. To this day when he calls me baby in his southern accent I either want to smile or cry. I always hoped one day I would really fall in love. I never expected that when I finally did it would be with a man I can never have.