I miss you today. Not because its Valentine’s Day or because I miss being in a relationship with you. But because today is one of those days.
Today, I looked around and I just felt lonely.
Today, I had to force my roommates to have wine night with me, so I could mask the feeling.
Today I laid in bed and cried because I miss my grandparents and my parents, and my brothers and I wish with all my heart that I could just tell them that and work on bettering my relationship with all of them.
Today I wish my ego didn’t get in the way of my relationships.
Today I wish I could let people see the weaker side of me and allow them to take care of me.
Today I wish you weren’t the only person I had ever let in. But you are. And so, today, I miss you. I miss you because sometimes I really need a shoulder to cry on and you are that shoulder. I miss you because sometimes I really need a friend to hear me out and you are that friend. I miss you because sometimes I really need a voice of reason when I just let my emotions take over and you are that voice. I miss you because sometimes I really just need someone to catch me when I’m falling, and you are that net. But you’re not my net anymore. You were that net, that voice, that friend, and that shoulder, but not anymore. So, I fall, and I break. But don’t worry, because somehow, I am able to pick my broken self-up and piece myself back together, all by myself. I just wish I didn’t have to.