I had a baby last year… a baby girl and I was not present with my wife during her labour. I almost saw my new born girl after a year recently and I don’t know, I don’t feel the love for her or any attachment. I couldn’t be with my wife and daughter because of my work commitments, and I spent over 2 months with them recently and again move out coz of my work.
I live in other country and can’t keep them with me coz of my financial issues here.
I recently started feeling like I rushed into being in a relationship and also, I sometimes feel that I don’t love my daughter neither my wife and I got angry on them both many times during my stay with them.
My daughter is only 14 months old and I still shouted on her, scared her even snap at her with my fingers. She was so scared that she cried whole night and was sobbing scared cuddled to my wife and did not let her go anywhere. I feel very bad and I am sorry for my actions I did even apologies to my baby girl, but I don’t think she understood.
I have anger issues in me and I snap often on small things. In the beginning I loved my wife wanted to spend my whole live with her, had this feelings that she was the one and was so happy that I can’t explain. But now I feel I don’t even love her at times and fight and argue and everything is different from before. I can’t explain why I don’t love my daughter my wife and why I am like this. I don’t have any one to share this with and have no true friends with whom I can confide with.
I am not a bad person, or a husband and I don’t think I will be a bad father, but I just don’t go along with these relationships tags I assume. God knows I am true to my heart I pretend I am a happy guy but its tearing me from inside this loneliness and the anger built in.
This is my life my story wanted to share for now. I hope someone can relate to this and jus help or suggest me on this.
Thank you for reading. God Bless yawl!!