My name is Ali. I am 16 years old. My nationality is Jordanian I live in Amman. I hate my father because he was the reason in destroying my life.
When I was at age of 9 I come back home from school by the bus I was scared to enter the home, so I go always to the garage to check if my mom in the house because if she was not in the house. All I know that he will start to shout at me and hit me.
So I got older a bit and my age was 12 that was the 7th grade I start to love the school and studying so I start to see that my friends are making jokes at me and I can’t hit them or do anything because one day I was in field playing with them and someone called Nabil push me and I hit the ground so my hand was broken so my father came to the school and start to shout at me so from that moment I can’t hit anybody or do anything because I was weak and scared from my father.
As you know I grow up and my age was 15 was in the 10th grade and at that year all I want is to pass my exams at the GCSE O levels so I was always getting in fights with my father about my study’s. I was always praying to god just to let me die and never feel the stress, but as we all know god created us for something in this life so he didn’t give me my wish. I examed all my exams and the results came so as we know to pass O level you should pass in 6 subjects and I pass on 5 subjects. The only subject I didn’t pass is ICT so he start to tell me that I am loser and I can’t handle any responsibility. I got sad and thinking what to do in my life just because I fail in one subject so all my thoughts was about to suicide or drop school.
My brother starts to call me in the world’s that he was calling me like loser etc, so I always get in fights with my brother. Now I am in 11 grade I am 16 I hate my life. I want to kill myself to get rid of this dirty life.
Today is 4/6/2018 and I have exam and he kicked me out of the house and I am waiting to go to the exam and finish it and start thinking in 3 ways, to complete my study and all the subject I fail in it to repeat it from my own money, or to drop out school and start working at any place to get my own money and start gaining money from gaming. The easiest way to kill myself because I am seeing that god created me for no reason that’s my story and never let someone control your life.