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Thing I Lost That I Never Really Had

I am sixteen years of age right now. One might think it’s a really tender age for someone to fall in love and don’t confuse my feelings with infatuation. I was in class 8th when she was in class 11th. I joined a new school cab. At first, she was just a senior to me. Months passed everything was normal. It was second term of class 8th I made up a lie to my friend that I liked her. Just to look cool.

Days passed I was promoted to class 9th she joined class 12th I started growing fond of her day by day. She left van and travelled by her own vehicle. I was sad, but I brushed aside my feelings, yet I was happy.

A year passed I was in class 10th she passed out from school. I was shattered, stopped talking to anyone in school home. It took me almost 3 months to get over depression, I regularly started cutting my hand with knife, blade etc.

Today I am in class 12th it just her I feel my life is all about. She isn’t even in Delhi yet I over days I drive around her house hoping to see her once. So that much to sukoon mile kabhi to raat ko chain se neend aaye.

Crying is a habit now. Every time I pray I wish her happiness 5 times a day. I just want to be left alone now. It feels like my desire to live is lost. I will live of course but I really won’t be living.

One Comment

  1. hey. it looks like u really like this person huh? and I know that this person is out somewhere and u cant really see this person often but I hope you find someone else that will always be there for you and someone who loves you with all their heart. I wish u all the best.

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