I hate my life. I try to be okay with it, but I hate it. Why am I struggling so much? Why are my efforts proving to be not enough every single time. I try and try and I’m never enough.
What is my purpose for being created? To struggle my entire life? What God. What!? sighs. I’m so exhausted. Just tired of being in this phase. Where I can’t catch my breath. I’m anxious as soon as I wake, bored as fuck during the day and anxious again before bed.
I just don’t get it. Everyone around me is flourishing. I’m in no way saying they had it easy or didn’t go through their struggles but they are rising. When do I rise? When are my efforts going to be enough? When? How much more do I have to survive? And the sad part about it all you have to pretend to be okay all the time. Always stay positive. Otherwise you’re negative Nancy.
You choose to act out and end up doing something stupid you get the wrong attention, and everyone will now think a mental institution should be my new home because oh my god she’s sick, she needs help. Pity.
Fucking annoying. I just long for someone I could be myself with. No judgement. Express how I truly feel and be understood. Be told it’s okay to feel the way you’re feeling and not feel like I have to pretend to be happy go fucking lucky walking around shitting rainbows and fucking glitter all the time.