I have reacted to her sayings: when she spoke about my family and caste.
Good things about mumma:
She is caring
She has never enjoyed her life and I feel she should now stay happy and relaxed
She is a good cook
She is loving
She seems to be fun loving, depending on her mood.
What has she done with me:
She has been v rude to me whether it is my fault or not. Even if it is rahul’s fault, she spoke all the bull shit to me. There is no limit to what bad and how bad things she has spoken to me.
She made me the target of her frustrations. If I did not do anything, she created fuss out of it. If I did she never appreciated. Again spoke bad abt it. She was not happy to send us out. She said I should not go out. Never taught me directly things should be. Always anger never showed love to me. I felt her love wen she put balm on my hand. And wen she bought chips for me after she spoke bad to me.
What I have done:
I have tried to pacify her whenever she was angry. Always heard silently whatever she spoke to me. Howsoever rude she may be. I tried to keep family together. I tried to be wid her whole time if I am at home. I never sit if she is working, I try to give her maximum comfort if I am there. But she never showed satisfaction/appreciation. . Mumma has always been vv self centered. She never showed happiness when I took a major decision to shift from delhi and leave my job just like that. Her attitude remained the same.
1. Wen rahul shifted to Delhi, the way she got rude with me. I kept communicating wid her, never left her just like dat. Kept sending her msgs on watsapp.
2. Holiday time : when she was alone. The way she behaved for 3 days she was extremely rude and spoke vvv badly with me.
3. Never received our calls if she did never spoke nicely.
4. I kept saying sorry to her without any fault
5. During holi, I was always beside her, even if she said all the rude thing she could have said.
6. Because she was unhappy, I stopped going out anywhere,
7. Because she was unhappy I changed my dressing style.
8. They earlier allowed me to wear night suit, but when I realized she doesn’t like it, I always went down stairs in salwar suits.
9. I have to stealthily go out with my husband so that she doesn’t feel bad.
10. She thinks whatever bad has happened to Rahul , has happened because of me and his involvement with me.
My Mistakes:
The day wen I moved away while she was speaking harsh to me in the morning,I did not come downstairs. Then she was out whole day. I was worrying about her very much but rahul showed from her call records that she has gone to her friend’s place. Wen she returned back, I sat with her for 5 min but wen she moved away from the room, I went upstairs again. I should have asked her,where she had been for the whole day. What she ate or etc…….. just for the sake of formality. I did not do that. Then after that, the huge fight happened between rahul and her . I was blamed the villain and the peace breaker and the same ols chudail bahu. Since then we are staying upstairs and she down stairs. Separately in our rooms. I am not allowed to do any work involve in any thing of her house. Just because of a single hing that I did…….. I dnt know whether I am at big fault or small fault. All I want is some personal space and some freedom for myself.
I had to react one day as otherwise the same thing would have to continue for lifelong. Someplace, somewhere,the line had to be drawn. She will have to understand that she cannot keep on doing this. This cannot continue. Somewhere she will have to limit herself.