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So this is how my story started

So this is how my story started I was 12 years old when I met this guy, J, at his sisters wedding. I had no idea that I was being made the bridesmaid (although the dresses of all the brides made were made in my size. But I guess my mom didn’t mention it to me because she knew, if she told me that,I was going to be the bridesmaid I would never had agreed to even give my size for the dress) and the guy I had to walk with inside the church was J. We did not speak a word to each other but I must say he had the most beautiful smile (even if he smiled a little those dimples would sink in) and his eyes were green. I was so scared and nervous that I didn’t even look at him nor did I speak much. The wedding was over and he went back to the states and we never spoke.
My parents teased me about him and it was very annoying initially but eventually I stated thinking of this guy. I mom she really likes this guy and use to tell me how good he was and how she wanted me to be with him and she thought that the ONLY guy that can keep her daughter happy was J, on the other hand my dad was not that fond of him but my dad was the one who did more of the teasing him with me.
When I was 16 years old I found J on Facebook and after months of just looking at his profile and never hitting the “send request” button I finally built in all the courage and hit that “send request” button and to my surprise my friend request was accepted. Even after that I never had the courage to text him “Hi” and after few months I told my mom I decided to show few pictures on his account to my mother. My mom she did not have a Facebook account so she put comments on his pictures from my account and wrote it was from her.
And after that J replied to those comments put by mom ( J really loved and respected my family That’s my entire family). And then I finally had the courage to send a hi message to him and to my surprise he did reply (yayy). He was the most sarcastic person I had ever spoken to. My day would start with texting him and end with texting him. We used to talk the whole day to each other and the day he told me that even his family tease him with me, I was sooo happy?.. We were in two different parts of the world but yet the internet never let me feel that. One night he called me and that was the first phone call and I was so nervous I just said hello and as I heard him I hung up and said I guess something went wrong. He was calling back and I was practice how to say hi and I was hoping my voice sounds good. (I guess every girl does that once in they life)
I really liked him and I felt he did too like me.. But he would only date me when we meet face to face and if both of us agree then when we meet. We had become very good friends and even if one day I did not talk to him I would feel miserable. And I used to pray to God daily that hope we meet and have a future ahead.
After few months he told me he was coming to India and I must have been the most happy girl in the world when he told that. I was looking sooo eagerly waiting for the days to go by when one fine morning my mom gets a phone call from an unknown number saying that ” hi, we have landed to India and we will visit you people in a week or so “. I was pretty happy that he is finally close by but sad that it will stilly take him few more days to come visit us.
J texted me from a local number of India and I was happy that we can still continue talking.
The day he was coming to my house I settled the entire room and even cleaned the washroom, I wanted to do everything myself, it was the most happiest day of my life ,25th of May 2010,I had prayed for this day for a year now . And finally I heard the car get inside the garage and I knew they were home, he had come with his mom dad and younger sister. I went in said hello to everyone but this was not easy like I thought I was sooo nervous that I didn’t speak to him and I just sent him a message at about midnight that can you please go to the dinning room I had left a gift for him (2 ties) and I hoped that he liked it and he did like it. I was very shy to speak to him so we did not speak for two days and then he finally sent me a message saying that I guess you don’t like me and don’t want to talk to me and I said noo it’s nothing like that and then on 28/05/2010 in the evening I spoke to him and in the same day at night we got into a retaliation (I was the most happiest girl and I though it was a dream. I loved J the most in my life). He was the Perfect boy for me and I could have done anything for him. He stayed in my house for 2 months and I guess those were the best 2 months of my life and I will cherish those two months till the last day I breath. In those two months we had fights but there was a lot of love.
It was his last day at my house and he was leaving for the states in 2 days. My dad had figured out that sometime was going on between me and J and he had told mom that I was not going to Delhi with them. I fought with papa that night a lot till I convinced him to allow me to go with him to Delhi. J was sad when he found out I was not going to Delhi till I gave him the good news that I am going with them till Delhi. The way to Delhi was about 300km and the entire way we were holding hands and he used to hold my hand tight in the middle and whenever he did that I said within me that I’m never leaving you no matter what happens in life and you always going to be a part of my life. The evening he was leaving to states was the worst day of my life, if I had known that was the last time we would meet and he would never come back for me I would have never let him go. When he hugged me at the airport I wished we could be like that for ever.
He went back to The States and we used to keep in touch through phone, email and Facebook. Everything was going good till I told him that he had to get into medical school because I knew then papa would have had no problem with him. And by Gods grace he did get into medical school.
He started his new life in the island, with his studies and made new friends and he got busy and in all this I was lost somewhere. We spoke less and he used to get angry on me with little little stuff. I though he busy with friends and studies.
One day I received an email from this Girl I don’t know and she said please leave J, because we dating. When I read that I had tears in my eyes and I could not believe that he would do something like that. And she used to email me and write all kind of rude stuff and abuse me. Me and J were already not in a good phase because he was busy and he got very short tempered. With all this at one time we had a break up. I used to call him and cry to him that I love you and please come back but he used to yell at me and hand up the phone and then I never spoke to him again after that.
I cried out to my mother and told her everything and she was very sad for me and it took me about 6 months to get stable after the breakup. I had fought with my dad a lot for J and when he found out what had happened even he had tears in his eyes. My parents helped me to get out of my depression.
We again spoke after 3 years when he told me that he is sorry and he wants to get back together but I refused to him and told him that I have fought with my parents earlier and now I can’t. I still loved him the same the way I had 3 years back but things were different now.
We started talking to each other daily and I was so happy but within I was scared what would my parents say. He had called my mother up but I mother did not answer even one of his phone call. He was sad and upset and he decided that we should never talk again because my parents were not happy about it and thus time again he did not realise that he is hurting me. I called him on his birthday to wish him initially he was normal but suddenly he started yelling at me and told we will never talk again. I am back to the same place, the depression is back and He left me a second time and this time I can’t even tell what happened to my parents because they had warned me about this way before in hand.
I love him so much that no matter what ever he does or says to me I just can’t hate him. I want to forget him but I think of him all the time. He never did nor ever will realise what I have gone through because it was about HIM only and never about us. But I will love time till the last breath of my life.

One Comment

  1. True love has many problems .Even I’m in worst position than you.I don’t know how they can do this.

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