I don’t get it. It is so weird. Here goes my life story. I am 16 year old girl and when i was 11 my father died. It is just me, my mother and brother. Recently we moved to overseas, I just feel that they are both short of my expectations. I don’t expect my mother to be one of those who get me every single gadgets or anything and neither my 14 year old brother to be my servant. What I don’t like is that when I get something even a little bit wrong she cant be normal, she has to call me an idiot, bitch, dumb etc. What if by mistake I turned on the wrong light. Like anger gathered of all day has to go on me. That makes me angry, speak louder which is why they call me a brain eater. She just wants me to fine be called all that. And then ALL I seek from my brother is respect. He does no work, just likes to play and annoy me by saying stupid things like you are this and that. If I just defend myself by just telling that I am not this or that, he turns this out to a fight. When told mother I get scolded because I should just try to not make the great lord ANGRY. Even though he started it, the fault is still mine. And I also feel difference in what she offers me and him in food. Its alright if there’s shortage of something and you don’t want to waste it on me, but just say it. You don’t have to play with words and trick me in ways that are too obvious. Today, I asked mum to get me books as soon as possible so that I could study for my exams NEXT WEEK. I tried my best to find cheap secondhand books online and she is just postponing it like it is not important. I feel so sad because I am not asking for any games or gizmos, I am not asking for brand new books but please tell her to get me those cheap books today or tomorrow, she is dying for a single cent. Another thing, it is funny but still, one day i was sad because I felt that my brother is so much important than me. I was crying hard and I slept while crying. What I dreamt was that i grow up and become a scientist and a develop something by which girls can change into boys. I drank it and became a boy and mother started loving me a lot. Funny. Yeah. I read the stories here and i realized that when there are people with much more sad experiences than you, you realize that you are not that unlucky. May gold bless all. Hmmmm I still don’t t feel any lighter, school’s also so boring especially without books and most teachers are mostly away no standard of teaching here. But who cares ya! Its my life, if I gotta make it large, I gotta work hard no matter how hard the circumstances may be, right. I am trying to make myself feel positive. Nothing better. I think I need someone to talk, but i don’t have friends (good ones) so yeah! Free advise- never share the bad experiences of your life with friends and family BECAUSE technically no one is yours truly. They will laugh and make fun of you at your back. Later on you are gonna regret-why you shared that thing with that person. You will always live in the fear that he might share your experience with someone else. And later on if the things go fine, you are gonna regret it. Everyone is selfish. Everyone. Therefore, always share it anonymously.
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