I’m 16 years old. Ever since I was a little girl I always remembered being punished more than my sibling (my older brother) and it was never fair punishment, say for insistence he puts me in a choke hold my mom yells at me for screaming get off and saying I triggered him to do it? Or she’ll ask me my side of the story only to disagree and say it’s my mouth and attitude that starts the arguments since when is standing up for myself an attitude! I always get beating on my behind for the most stupid things that aren’t worth punishment like today my little cousin lied and said I hit him now I’m on punishment. My mom never believes me even though most of the time I’m telling the truth whenever she get a phone call from my brother which he does a lot it is his lie he makes up or scheme to get me in trouble next thing is I get a text saying I’m going to beat your ass or she take my phone away that she didn’t even buy!! Away from me, and it’s like no matter what I do its never enough I always talk to her about putting me in programs that could possibly get me scholarships or sports what does she do ignore me, or I’ll tell her something that is going on such as a party ask if I can go out and I tell her all details she never wants me around but when I try to go she won’t allow it .
I work hard in school to get the best grades I can, she doesn’t care she calls me stupid or a smart ass all the time can I have an opinion on things? No she gets offended when I tell her how I truly feel I’m so depressed it seems like when I’m happy she’s pissed I’m happy, and when I’m sad she’s glad an comes and bothers me it’s bad enough she won’t let me get braces because I’m self conscious but she won’t take me to go to any health appointments I need doctors dentist, gynaecologist,I’ve had several problems one time I asked can I go talk to someone like a therapist she smirked and said why? I didn’t really want to explain why. All my life my mom aunt and Nana have always showed favouritism towards my brother and he has stolen stuff, had sex, told my mom he hates her, lied, came home late, and never does his chores but they always have praised him and he’s a lazy son of a bitch and when my mom was ill she called for his help while he was in the house he never came so I helped her but when I’ll she never helps me she makes me cook clean and act as if I’m healthy, I cook for myself I clean my room day and night I clean the whole house up by my brother never cleans on his days and if I even dare tell my mom she curses me out when he’s the lazy one. I’m a Virgin – never had sex, I never stole, never said I hate my mother and I never got pregnant while on the other hand he did get a girl pregnant and she’s living with us and now my life is hell because of her because she still takes up for him he’s a lazy dropout and does nothing while I’m literally breaking my back trying to show my mother I am a good child not perfect but not a mistake But I sure feel like it, like I was a mistake my dad doesn’t care for me, my step-dad does sometimes and my mother neglects me she won’t even cash my checks for me to get things I need instead she holds them for herself, she told me get a job and I did still not impressed she tells me I get on her nerves everyday and tells every one in the family I’m the reason for all her stress I do what I can to stay away but when I do she assumes it’s an attitude, I’m never right always wrong I don’t know what I am but I sure feel like a outcast or black sheep because my dreams aren’t shit to no one in this family sometimes I feel I don’t belong but I feel if I leave i let them win so a any advice or truth because right now it’s like a hard knock life for me and I feel like a failure.