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I fell in love, but he keeps talking about his first crush

So this is my experience. I was in 2nd pic and was looking for a guy… yes I wanted to fall in love very badly. I don’t the reason why but just wanted someone to love me maybe because my parents we’re separated and I needed to feel that love of care or love… First, I met this guy. He was physical with me and that lasted only for 15 days. I knew he just wanted to use my body and while getting over that, this guy proposed me and I said yes and we we’re in a relationship for 6 yrs.

We actually married in 1 week of meeting without my parents knowledge because I was not just able to believe guys, but I told about my relationship to my parents and his parents. I was so careful as not to get cheated this time. I shared all my experience with him.. How my parents are separated, how from my childhood my life has always been hard and how much I love him, that he is my everything. We we’re physical in the relationship. The first 2 years were great and then I felt like he was losing interest in me, he also started getting violent with me but still I was not able to leave him.. He used to not share our photos publicly, which made me feel very insecure. Maybe I was not good enough for him and he used to always talk about his first crush and compare me with her and used to always tell how she was better than me in every way. I am a left handed and my right is not proper and I am short so made me feel maybe its because of this he hated me so much and I should adjust even though he was insulting me and he was so doubtful that he did not allow me to talk to guys or use social media.

I went through everything with him.. Stood through all his hardships and helped him financially and did not leave him no matter what. Then one day I got a doubt that he is in talking terms with his first crush and it hurted me a lot cause he had hid this for me.. He completely denied it. It came to point where I said if you love her go with her let’s break up. But he kept denying saying she was married. Suddenly he stopped talking to me, phone was switched off. I contacted his family, mom, dad and brother but all of them who were very nice to me till that point started talking rubbish to me and told that he was not interested in me anymore.. that I was the one that was always behind him. I waited for few months couldn’t take it anymore. Went to his business place, to open which I helped him financially. Saw his first crush sitting there, that’s when I learn that he is in prison for 3 months.. 3 months got over he still didn’t contact me. I asked all his friends many told he is with her now.. she had left her husband and my guy have married and are together. I even asked her.. She denies it and says they are friends. Still last he didn’t respect me enough to give an explanation or end our relationship. Took me while to come out of this but I did with my family and friend’s support.. It’s been 10 months almost now I see that they both are friends on Facebook. I never want him in my life but I just want to know was he always playing from day 1? Even though he knew I was so broken was his intention only to cheat me? Is he really with her? Did he really cheat so much? Was I dumb enough to believe in true love? What was my mistake in this to believe him more than god to love him beyond myself and get left like this?

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