Those who will probably read my sorry will call me stupid and a horrible person, but God knows I never meant for this to happen. I am 25 years old and I just got a new job. I have several bosses who are okay and some who are a pain, but there is this particular one I just can’t get off my mind. He was one of those who interviewed me, and when he did, I saw him just as a normal guy, my boss.
I got the job and I don’t even know when this started, but am so crazy about him. When he talks or laughs or just calls my name my heart skips a beat. When he doesn’t talk to me or even say my name, I feel sad and bad the whole day. When I hear him joke and laugh with other people here at work whether male or female, I wish it was me he was talking to or laughing with. But he never laughs with me or just talk to me, he only talks to me when he is ordering me to do something. Most times it feels and looks like he hates me, though I don’t know why he does.
I have never told anyone about my feelings and I try or I try to act normal around him, but it really hurts not to have him notice me. I want him to SEE me, even if it’s just once, I want him to notice that me the woman exists.
He is married and that is why I said that you guys will probably think me horrible, but I really like him. He is not so handsome, he is okay looking, he has a bad attitude, he is so proud, he is rude, almost everyone hates him, but I don’t know why am so hang up on him. Whenever he mentions his wife my heart hurts, when I look at his wedding band on his hand I wish it was me who put it there. I recently found out his wife is pregnant, but am so jealous God help me. I have never been so jealous of someone like I am of his wife, sometimes I just sit there and wish I had met him earlier before he met his wife. Would he have liked me, would he have noticed me, would I have become his wife?
Someone help me, what can I do to get over him? Do you think am obsessed with him? What is wrong with me? I have even never liked dating a workmate especially my boss, but sometimes I feel like if he asked me out for even just a night, I would give it to him. I had to tell someone so I decided to share it here, if there is someone out there who can even mildly help me, Please help me. But am dying slowly with these feelings for this man.