I used to be sweet, humble, fun loving and cheerful till class 10th. I was topper in maths and science. I was a maths lover but the day I entered class 11th my life took a turn against me.
On 20th April 2015 my non-medical classes started and on 21st April 2015 I started getting ill and still I’m sick. I switched over to commerce and now I am in 12th class. I never broke down but now its high time. Between all this my parents supported me a lot. They helped me, they cared for they did all they can. they used to cry but never in front of me. Today I am alive just because of them. They consulted me to the best doctor gave all their time to me. But now due to my illness I am have become short tempered, frustrated. I easily get angry on the despite they did so much for me. I am have started feeling I am burden, tension, bad luck, trouble liability, garbage which has no value. I used to be topper now I have no interest in studies I have become lazy. I have no future, it is all dark. Full day I just lay lamely on bed. I can’t do anything I am tired of all this. I am tired and frustrated of myself.
It isn’t I am whole time depressed still I am fun loving and cheerful but sometimes I can’t just handle my situation out then I feel depressed.
My parents never forced me to study and achieve good grades but I wanted to something for them. Due to lack of strong will and determination I am not able to achieve anything. Till class 10th I wanted to study hard and have bright future ahead but now it isn’t. I am running away from life from its difficulties. Sometimes I think of suicide not because I am not in condition to achieve something but for my parents. They did too much for me and in return I am just giving them pain. I am not a good daughter.