I am confused and I need help. I don’t want to share my childhood but let’s just say that my real dad left when I was around 6. My mom married about 5 times. They disrespected her. One of them beat her into unconsciousness half the time. I had to watch most of it.
I know my mom tried. And still does. But she doesn’t know who I am or what I do. She used to beat me when she couldn’t beat those men. I’m the oldest out of 4. I’m 15 years old. I’ve had sex with 5 guys. And none of them want to stay. One of them is going to date another girl.
One of them raped me and wants nothing from me.
One of them used me because he was depressed after his breakup. He moved states away.
One of them just kind of happened.
And the last one I fell in love with. But he just had his friend text me saying that he can’t talk to me anymore. He can’t handle it. I just had a pregnancy scare. My mom sent me to my real dads for a week. I send nudes when I’m depressed. I cut and used to do drugs. I’ve had many failed suicide attempts. I sneak out.
I’m your typical teenage rebel. Or whore either way. I know I’m beautiful in a lot of ways. But I just don’t want to hurt anymore. I love talking to people. I want a relationship. I’m smart. I just have anger issues. I got kicked out of school for breaking things. People say I need a counsellor but they know I won’t tell them shit. I just need help. I need someone who will give me a chance. Because it seems like no one else will.