I was fine with my life up until last Monday. I am still in love with my ex, but I was able to cope with it. On Monday, I asked if he wanted to go to the hot tub, and he said yes. We went, and that is when things hit the fan.
We start talking and he suddenly says that he is going to move to Arizona with his family and with his girlfriend. My heart sank. I dunked my head under the water so he wouldn’t see me crying. We change the subject for a bit, but then I decide I need to know more information because this isn’t something he can just bring up abruptly.
He says that his dad is getting a job out there. So, his mom and dad are finding their own place. His girlfriend, sister, and himself are going to find their own place as well. I’m holding back my tears at this point because I’m not just losing him, but I’m losing his family. To which I love them very much.
He then explains how him and his girlfriend are having problems and he’s not even sure if he wants her out there anymore. He said he doesn’t think he even wants to date her anymore because they go through the same drama and arguments all the time. He said he has a gut feeling she is cheating on him because she dodges his messages and calls a lot after 8 pm. She talks to her co-worker that she was sleeping with for a month while her and my ex were on a break. Every day apparently.
He said he doesn’t know what to do in this situation because he doesn’t want to upset her by breaking up with her. And then he decides to tell me that I was beautiful, and that he is so sorry for hurting me in the past. He basically explained he still has feelings for me without saying the actual words. My heart hurts even more at this point because I still feel the same way. But now, I have no idea what to do because he is moving. He isn’t the cheating type, and neither am I. So, he said he cannot make a move or even think about it until he decides to break up with her.
I would drop everything I have to be with him and his sister in Arizona. They are so close to me, and I want to be with his family. His family treats me better than my own family does. His mom helped me find religion again, his dad helped me find a stable father figure in my life, his sister pretty much became my sister because I trust her with my life. And he gave me everything. He made me think positive on life, and he made me laugh, smile, and truly feel happy. I’m ready to leave everything behind for him. But, I can’t just ask if I can come to Arizona with him. I’m not the person to impose on his life. He needs to ask me, but I don’t know what will get him to ask me. He thinks I made my life here, so he won’t ask me until he breaks up with her, and is sure that I am willing to leave here. How do I convince him to let me go with his family, without imposing?
I’m not going to throw away what I have, so don’t give me the typical “you’re better off without him,” “he has a girlfriend so don’t try,” “he only wants to hook up one last time.” I know he’s not like that. I know him better than that.