I’ve always heard about love from one side, everyone says its suffering and painful, but I never understood that.
Today, I feel them, people who been through this. It’s really confusing loving somebody that don’t even know you exist.
I mean it starts from liking that person, liking the physical part, the walk, the smile, you don’t even care about that, but it goes then to addiction, you wait him till he comes home, you just wait that sound of his car or the smell comes around, then without even knowing any part of his life you start dreaming about him, imagining him beside you, building those dreams about your life together, you need to scream that you exist, but you say who the hell I am to even think about him caring about me, especially if he has somebody in his life, especially that when you see him you feel shy and never say a word. I mean I never thought I’ll feel this way about someone, I don’t even know how to go through this. Then I go back to reality and say he’s just a crush. I sometimes talk to him in my mind, make real conversations, my best friend says everything could be possible, but he’s going to get married! I smiled and cried at the same time, why I smiled? I still trying to figure out why. He’s my ghost. And I’m he’s fairy. Too hard feeling, ha?