Hello. I am a twenty-two-year-old, I am finishing college, I live with my parents. I am a man child. The horror I have for any kind of responsibility made me quit not only one but two internships my dad fixed up for me. Oh yeah, my dad had to do that because I couldn’t even handle looking for an internship.
If I am afraid of that, how the fuck am I ever going to get a job right? My extreme aversion to responsibility makes me break my promises, disrespect my peers and generally turns me into a disgusting dependent impossible to live with mess of a person.
The only reason I am able to live with myself is because I try my best to justify that an avoid the truth by numbing myself with eating and masturbation and YouTube and Netflix.
I have a terrible relationship with my dad, but I am going to deliberately perpetuate that situation by getting a master’s degree on the university my dad teaches just because he told me to and I don’t really know what else to do but obey. Wish I had the balls to kill myself.
Oh my gosh.
First things first, don’t die. Definetly don’t die. Live. Dying is the worst decision ever.
Well that seems like a lot of weight on your shoulders, huh?
Is getting a masters degree part of what you want or what your dad wants? Think about it.
Find what YOU want to do. Find what makes YOU happy. Excell at it. Make a life for yourself. Find what you are meant to do and be.
It’s a path we all have to take alone, but right now it’s ok you’re in your parents house.
You have to start somewhere, right?
What is it you love doing? Are you good at it? Maybe its what you’re meant to be. Do it more often. Find what’s meant for you.
Also, maybe disconnect from the world for a while to figure out what you want and how to get there.