Today as I lay here in my bed waiting for my wife to get home. My mind wanders from thought to grim thought. I stare at the half-finished basement that we live in, and all that’s on my mind is how I want to not live.
My brother died eleven years ago and its painted my life black. I had happy childhood no extreme trauma, nothing. Until the day that he did not come home. I was fifteen, got good grades. Then that happened it was sole crushing, after that it I got into everything picking fights, drugs, gangs, lots of crimes.
Honestly, I am lucky to be alive. My wife found me a few years back and even with me dumping her once before, she still loves me. She fixed me. I look back and know that she is the one keeping me from going off the edge. Even with neurological trauma, PTSD, scars from hell.
Every night I lay awake looking over her body and think she is the reason that I refuse to let go. I love you with all my forever broken pieces. Because you are just as broke as I am. you deserve me at my best glued back that i can be. You are young and oh so strong.
Even if you don’t or won’t see it. are worth more much more than I can ever give you. Every day your mind body and soul save me from death. So, in short, my life is rich in love and that is all I want to share.