I know you don’t know me nor you never will, but I wanted to share my story with someone, I had too.
For the past twenty-seven I have been a victim of emotional, mental and at times physical abuse. It started when I was seven years old, trying to learn math, my father thought a good way to get the sums in my head would be to hit me on the back of the head every time I got one wrong.
This lead to years, after of mental, emotional and physical torture at the hands of a raging man who thought he could do no wrong. See the problem, was everything was always mine and my mom’s fault and never my dad. We caused his rages, the things he said the reasons he acted the way he did.
I remember one, my mom having to stand between me and my dad so that he wouldn’t whip me with a belt. I was living with a monster, yet I never realized it, how you may ask, because I had been conditioned not to see the signs. The fact that my depression and my thoughts of suicide was a side effect of my environment, and not me being completely crazy was news to me.
The abuse got more targeted over the years, calling me a “bitch”, “useless”, threatening to throw me out. Let me tell you something they don’t report abuse doesn’t stop because the child grows up it continues into adulthood. I was able to get from my dad for a while, but due to financial issues I had to move home for a while and it has just gotten worse.
Yesterday, my father crossed a line I thought he never would, on my birthday he took the verbal and emotional abuse to a new level, crossed a line I thought he never would. It has left me heartbroken, shaking and questioning myself. I have lost all respect for my dad and I know now that to be happy I have to cut this man out of my life.
So, know, I am making a plan to save up and move out. I don’t have the financial ability to be free yet, but I am working on it. Thank-you for the taking the time to read my story I just needed to know I wasn’t alone and that someone knew what I was going through. Bless you and thank-you.