I feel very lonely. I was in a 4 year long distance relationship with someone who cheated on me and that led me to attempt suicide. I was in coma for a week was in hospital for a month and then returned home to see my so-called love getting engaged to some NRI girl. I was in shock so I in a phase of taking revenge came to Australia and was informed that he was getting married in December.
I wanted to somehow show him that I am happy without him so found a random guy on shaadi.com and got married before he got married. I was lucky enough to find a decent guy.
However, my luck did not last longer than a week. Soon he started getting violent and started to beat me. I hesitated to tell my parents about it because they would be broken to hear this. I was bullied for about a period of 6 months then I told my sister about it. She told my parents and I went back to my parents.
We were all set for a divorce, but I felt something for him and gave him another chance. He changed a lot he started to show me care and affection. I was happy. Then came the day I get to know that I was pregnant. I was terrified as I knew he would not be happy. To my surprise he was not really unhappy on this news.
However, his parents said this is not the right time for a baby and suggested him to get it aborted. I was horrified by the fact and did not have the courage to refuse either. I killed my baby. I don’t know if it was a boy or a girl, but it was my baby. I killed my baby.
I was depressed for few months then with work and help of friends got back to life. It is now 3 years that we have been married and I beg to God for a baby. Yet again my bad luck comes in.
My husband who is very practical in life says it is still not the right time to get started with a family. There is one more thing to it which I didn’t tell you guys. I am happily married to the world, but this so called happy marriage does not even shares a bedroom.
Me and my husband sleep separate since last year. We did not fight we are still very much in a relationship. He comes to my room whenever he wants to have sex. He cannot sleep in the room because he has a back problem and it is better when he sleeps on the couch. I am there for him to wash his clothes, cook for him and serve him when he feels like having sex.
I do not have any close friends of mine with whom I could share this with. So, I am sharing it here. It feels better. It feels good to get the feelings out of your system to make you feel lighter.
Thanks all my anonymous friends.