This time last year I had lost about twenty-five to thirty pounds. It was normal weight loss, and I had been eating normally. After a while though, I began barely eating. I would take about four bites of my food twice a day, and that would be it. was starving myself unintentionally.
Eventually, I was so hungry since I had barely been eating, so I began to binge eat. Every day when I would get home from school, I would grab whatever was in the fridge and just eat. Then whatever was in the cabinet. I gained weight exceptionally fast. After a few months, I began to barely eat again to lose weight faster. I lost all the weight I gained within 3 weeks. I felt great.
Then I began to binge eat again, except this time it just didn’t end. For about 6 months I was binge eating without anyone knowing. It wasn’t until I went to a camp for disabled human beings that I realized what I was doing to my body. I was so unhappy with myself and the way I looked that I would emotional eat.
After I spent a week without my phone, strangers, and disabled kids, I suddenly never felt more myself. I realized that there is a God, and He makes no mistakes. The beautiful kids I met love Jesus and see their disabilities as a gift from Him. It amazed me that they were so content with their lives, and I was pitying myself when I’m very healthy and fortunate.
I am now eating healthy (not too little and not too much), and I pray every day and go to Church every Sunday. If you struggle from some sort of eating disorder or feel unhappy with yourself, just know that your body deserves better treatment than this. You deserve better than this. It may seem that being skinny is everything, but it is not. It may sound cheesy but being yourself is the best thing one can do because if you do not embrace who you truly are, you are betraying God and yourself. I hope I helped some of you, and I wish nothing but happiness upon all of you.