My whole life I can say that I’ve been disappointed by my close “friends”. I have always always been good to them. I would always support them. Heck, even if we weren’t close or if we drifted apart I would still take the time to remember their birthday. I never envy my friends for their life or their accomplishments. I feel happy for them. Truly and genuinely happy. But unfortunately for me, that is not the treatment I received back. The person i have been friends with all my life had repeatedly, in the past couple of years, insulted me, has never supported me, and I know for a fact that she’s never been happy for me because of her jealousy. Now I ignored it, as I usually do, because I like to see the good in people. I didn’t want to believe and to be honest part of me couldn’t believe that someone would think like that and act like that. Needless to say I moved and I’m busier than I have been before but I try to keep in contact as much as I can. She unfortunately doesn’t. I don’t know why, I’m guessing she can’t believe that I actually left that horrid town. I mean I get it if you’re angry but I’m writing this because my birthday was the other day and I didn’t even receive a text from her. Nothing. Not from her and not from any of my so called friends I had over there which did sting a little. I mean after all those years not even a happy birthday? But you know I guess I’m over it. These other friends that I met here… well I thought they were different. I mean, they are I guess but they still have their own little things. Two of them keep hiding things and whispering and just observing. It’s unnerving. Now I respect that you know? You don’t have to tell me anything, but you have no right to then to come and want to know every little detail of my life. Where I’m going, who I’m with, who I’m talking to… You get the point. But hey, I still want to believe that’s not them and that they’re not really like that. I mean whatever. But what caused me to cry today was the fact they best friends while I was writing a research paper, a 13 page research paper I wrote all by myself, she was joking around with friends and laughing and I don’t know what else. Hey I’ll write the damn thing if it’s hard for you, but at least sit by me and help and give tips. It’s not fair audit’s not right. Honorable nice people have no place in this world because everyone has become corrupt and all they do is look out for themselves. And that makes me sad. For the world and for everyone. I don’t regret that I’m like this so trusting. I just wish it didn’t get thrown back into my face. But hey maybe I’m overreacting. It just feels good to get it off my chest. 🙂
