It’s been almost a week since our presidential election. I still can’t seem to understand why happened last Tuesday. I spent all of my Wednesday crying and some of Thursday. My friends and I text constantly trying to understand it all l. My husband said people were crying at his work in the hallways. I like to think of myself as an open minded person. While I am usually a democrat I have and would vote for republican if I preferred the candidate. To be honest I saw no good qualities in our now president elect, but above all I did not understand his “policies” or his plan for our country. I watched all 3 debates and he said nothing to change my mind in the slightest. If anything he avoided questions and sniffled a lot. I want to make it clear that I don’t hate our president elect I just don’t want him to be my president. I wish he lost and just went away and lived a happy life in his tower. I feel like in the last 8 years so much has happened and we had made such growth in this country. I thought last Tuesday we would continue to break the mold and show the world what an amazing place this is to live. But none of that happened. Instead we reinforced the mold and made it harder to break. Despite why people don’t like Hillary Clinton we will not have an as qualified candidate and in particular a woman candidate for a long time. I still can’t believe she didn’t win. I find it so hard to believe that so many people could vote for a man so hateful and self absorbed. As Hillary said we are more divided than we realize. I have two small boys and I find it hard to explain to them how a person like this won. I want my boys to know you can be good, kind, smart, and honest and still be in a powerful position. I want them to know you don’t have to put others down to be the one on top. I am trying my best to still believe that. I want them to not only be good men but good people. I think I truly went thru the stages of grieving. First denial- how could this have happened to our country? How could he have won? Second anger- I was angry at people for voting for him, people who wasted their vote, and people who just didn’t vote at all. I got over this stage quickly because everyone has the right to vote to whoever they want I just didn’t realize it would be so many people. Third bargaining- I tried to convince myself that if I could change the election results if I did something differently. Fourth depression- This stage has been the hardest. I keep trying to understand the decision of the voters and why so many voted for him. It makes me sad that so many people could agree with deporting people, over turning gay marriage, giving anyone guns, and shutting down plan parenthood. I keep thinking how this decision will affect everyone’s lives for a long time not just the next 4 years. We need to be lifting each other up not pushing each other down. Fifth acceptance- I truly don’t think I am there. I don’t really think I should ever be there. I don’t think anyone should be. I will not accept that some like this has won our presidency. I am not sure if protesting is the answer. I am not sure what the answer is but I will fight to keep my kids from being destroyed by hateful people. I will do everything I can think of to bring on change for the better. We must do something to come together. We as a country need to unite and be a force. We can’t not let this break us. When it comes down to it we are not democrats, republican, men, or women… we are all people and that is what we need to remember and fight for.