I feel the happiest when I talk with my on-line friends. Why? Maybe it’s because they do not know the real me and I do not know the real them. There are no truthfulness in what we said or shared. And I guess I am okay with that. Talking about silly things is better than all the drama we had in our real life, right?

But then, as I get closer to them, I feel like I want to really see them. So we planned about those meet-ups and hang-outs, talking about those road trips to California, renting those beautiful places… but we all knew it was just wishful thinkings. On-line friends may care to each other, because it is easy to say in words. We will never offer real help since we are not real anyway.

That is the logic, the fact. Yet, sometimes, I would feel this throbbing sadness in my heart, and really wish that everything could happen in real life. I wish we could have fun in Universal City; I wish we could eat sushi in Japanese Town; I wish we could stay at those beautiful AirBnb we chose and walk along the shore line. I wish… I wish… I wish…

But all just wishful thinking.