I am a boy and currently I am 16. At the age of 14. My friend introduced a girl to me. Then, we started to talk at the bus stop every Tuesday for a few months also we started to chat every day.
Slowly we create memories, we get closer and closer, we video call, voice call. We walked together at the park. We have tons of topic.
Slowly I realized that I had a crush on her, but I did not let her know. After a few months, I started to treat her in a better way, the way I treat her, the way I took care of her, the way I talked to her is too unique and she finally knows that I had a crush on her. But we did not talk about it, we continued to chat and call happily like how we used to.
On 27th august 2017 she finally tells me that we cannot be together. I was confidence before she told me. I thought I was close, I thought I just have to wait to the best timing to confess. But suddenly she told me that we cannot be together because she loved the other guy whom did not spend more effort than me. At the time, I just want to die. My mind just full of ” Die “.
I asked her, why did you choose him but not me. And she said, ” the time he spent with me is more than you” (she was in the same class with the boy and I wasn’t). Just like this, my relationship does not have money.
All the memories we created together, all the promise we did. Everything just broke with a few sentences. It hurts right? Aren’t that? It was august of 2017 and I was about to face one of the important exams on October. Right after that day, I couldn’t focus on any work that I am doing. I cried during class, I can’t focus on my studies. I knew I had depression. I hurt myself. I cut my self and leave a scar “? L.”
My exam result turns bad too. Now she is in love with the guy still and all of my friends told me to move on and after 10 months I am still here. Today is 22nd June 2018 and what can I say is I still loved her, but I couldn’t share it to anyone. I just want to say it here. I really want to die.
This world is hopeless right? I shouldn’t be so loyal right? Is it bad to have loyalty to someone? I am sorry then. The colour in my life is just BLACK without her. I need her, that’s it. I should leave this creepy unfair world.