Here’s how I wasted 2 of my teen years, and in return wasted the remainder of someone else’s.
We are all ware of the importance of the development both physically and mentally that occurs during the teen years, and we’re all aware that these developments can be affected through multiple traumas, issues and plain fuck-ups. Here’s how I fucked up my mind in my teens.
When I was but a young’n, I met this wonderful girl, let’s call her Melissa. Melissa was pretty, funny and to top it all off, the target of many others’ affection. However, after months of her jumping between boyfriends and having short periods of being single, she decided to give the nerdy, slightly out-of-shape me a try after I helped her stop smoking weed.
At first, she was underwhelmed as I was shy and cautious with everything I said and did around her, yet as we moved into out 3rd/4th month or-so, I gained a healthy charisma around her and from that blew her mind at what I was capable of, both as someone to love and someone to have love with, if you catch my drift. During this period of change in our relationship, she began to grow an intense obsession over me, which is something I didn’t mind at the time, yet would become problematic in time.
After about 9 months, it was Christmas time. Of course we would buy each other gifts, yet she was becoming so obsessive and worried about what I wanted that it was actually pretty scary, so at that point I told her that I really didn’t mind and would rather have her feel calm and relaxed about our relationship rather than constantly fumbling over every mistake that she thought she had made. Of course, I worded this a little more friendly like. This was both the biggest mistake and best decision I had made in this whole relationship.
After this she became cold and distant, which worried me greatly, and after 3 or 4 months of time she came to me, claiming that she was forced to have sex with another guy, which I will call “Dean”. I was shocked and helped her through this like anyone else would, making sure that she recovered healthily and with much love and support. I then thought it would be a great idea to bring her with me on the school summer trip to Italy, which we both had a wonderful time on, enjoying the R&R that came with it.
On the way back from Italy, she is spending a lot of time on her phone, which she accounted to her “cousin” texting her a lot about “family” summer plans. of course, through my use of inverted commas, you can tell something was up, so when she went to the bathroom for a few minutes, I picked up her phone and saw a barrage of texts from another guy, Dean. Dean was our age, and was muscle-y, handsome and had the intelligence of a half-chewed shoelace. It was at this point I discovered that she was not held against her will, and rather was just cheating on me because she was angry due to her own obsession.
Of course, when she returned, I was livid. I began to explain how much care and love I had given her in return for this, and during my (justified) rant, she began bawling her eyes out. It was from this point forward I was heralded as an abusive, hateful partner by the most of my school group, simply for confronting a cheating, lying girl about her affairs.
Please let me emphasise; I WAS HATED FOR BEING CHEATED ON, SIMPLY BECAUSE THE CHEATER WAS CRYING AFTER HAVING A 4 MONTH AFFAIR WITH ANOTHER GUY BEHIND MY BACK.
Most of us would, when given this situation, would break up with the cheating psycho. But I couldn’t. I was being forced to stay with her, as she would accuse me of abuse and assault, when I had never even laid a finger on her without her strict permission, and she had emotionally tortured me out of spite.
So for 1 entire year, I was made to stay with her. She regressed into her psychotic obsession for me, beginning to copy the things that I did, my hobbies, mannerisms, you name it. Eventually she became so reliant on my input, influence and attention that she would actively intimidate me with very real threats of accusation and reputational dismantling just to keep me in line.
However, with school behind me at this point, and me being nearly an independent adult, I began to do my own thing without her, one of such things was going to a concert in a nearby city which a few friends were attending. While there, I met a wonderful girl who had been in the year above me in my school, and she opened my eyes to what a real loving companion should be, and while remaining faithful to my current psycho-crazy-cheating girlfriend, didn’t take that any further than conversation and a few playful smiles.
However, when I returned home, I was bombarded by my girlfriend regarding the concert, her saying that I was cheating on her with some, as she put it, “hipster whores”, and said that she was going to tell everyone if I didn’t apologise immediately.
Most of us would, when given this situation, would agree to the apology to make sure that our reputation was not crumbled by some psycho-crazy-bitch. However, I simply told her what had happened that night, and told her I was leaving her.
She immediately began bawling, telling me that she didn’t want my kind, funny and supportive self to leave her, and in return I simply told her that she should have shown me some compassion outside of an unhealthy obsession, and the occasional affair.
That was yesterday, and I am the happiest I have ever been, with a date organised with the wonderful girl I had met at the concert, and the psycho-ex attempting to get me back in any way she can, and I can tell you now, she never will.
I guess the moral of this story is, don’t tie yourself down early. If you believe that you want to be with someone, don’t jump right in, take it slowly and make sure you’re comfortable together, and most importantly, if someone cheats on you, don’t let them twist that in their favour. Also, don’t let others take control of your life, you’re your own person, and you should do what you want, not what they want.
Thank you for reading my strange story, and have a wonderful day