I am totally disappointed with myself in life. I always wanted to be someone who would help everyone around, be someone who can turn to get some relief.
But I have failed. Falling to my addictions, wasting, not taking care of things properly on time.
I work at top notch company where I do get paid decently. Still I am in debt struggling to cover up my expenses every month. I am even taking money from my wife’s account, which she gave access to me with full trust. Which again I hope to repay when I will overcome my situation. (?)
I have no bad habits. I don’t smoke, I don’t gamble, I don’t drink, I don’t go to pubs, I don’t go to cinemas, I don’t buy things for myself, I don’t donate much, I don’t go to luxury restaurants and I can go on.
The only thing I spend behind is my family. Trying to give the all the comfort, without making them feel how I am managing these.
Taking loans after loans and now, I have lost track of my life. I am broken. I have no saving. Nothing. No asset.
What will my family do if I die? They will be out in the streets. My beloved wife, my ten years old sweet princess daughter, my five years old handsome son – what will they do?
I am a good for nothing, in every sense.